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But after months of reparative therapy, he found himself even more depressed, drinking more heavily, unable to function at work, and still lying to Mia about his sexual attractions. Mia consulted their priest, conducted extensive research on the Internet, and identified a reparative therapist to help him "overcome" his homosexual impulses.
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To the contrary, she thanked him for his honesty and assured him they'd be able to "get through this together"-as long as Rob remained true to his faith and worked on their marriage. To Rob's surprise, Mia didn't reject him. Finally, out of desperation, he told his wife, Mia, about his lifelong sexual attraction to men. Outwardly, he was the epitome of success, admired and envied by his siblings as the star of the family inwardly, he experienced himself as fraudulent, hopeless, and trapped. After college, he became a lawyer, fathered three children (now 13, 15, and 18), and started his own law firm with a colleague. Perhaps to overcome his shame, he excelled academically, medicated himself with alcohol, and married a Roman Catholic woman his parents considered the perfect mate for him. He described a long struggle with his sexual orientation, growing up in a devoutly Roman Catholic family, where he learned that his sexual attraction to men was cause for eternal damnation. Just out of alcohol rehabilitation treatment, he'd begun attending AA meetings, where he'd shared parts of his story. Rob had been referred by a former client of mine he'd met in an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. I knew this was not Rob's first experience in therapy and that a lot was riding on what I was about to say. As he paused, awaiting my response, quite honestly, I was awaiting my response as well. He sighed and began: "Okay, I'm gay, I'm married, I have three kids, and I'm not getting divorced." He'd shared some of this information with me in our phone conversation, but I was still struck by the sense of hopelessness in his tone. He set his bags down, gently put his Blackberry on the table in front of him, and heaved himself onto the couch.
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These naysayers are certainly entitled to their opinions but they fail to grasp that these are far from universal.įor those who would deny the expression of mutually felt love and affection, we say believe what you will but do not invent harm where there is none.Rob rushed into his first session with me, gym bag on one shoulder, briefcase on the other, 10 minutes late and out of breath. The opponents of gay marriages, including hypocrites in the Catholic Church, claimed to know what is natural and what the word of their variously characterized gods is. Were they only to grant the same tolerance for the love that does dare to speak its name, the same love celebrated in the art and poetry of many cultures, the love between man and boy that was once synonymous with forbidden homosexuality. Even if we do not agree with the assimilationist aspirations of those seeking gay marriages, we can admire the steadfastness of those who struggled to achieve their goal. They would also disown, were they alive today, the likes of Allan Ginsberg, Oscar Wilde, Socrates and many other such luminaries and icons of civilization. In aping the heterosexual lifestyle ("We're just like everybody else except for our choice of partners.") much of the gay leadership has cast overboard those they felt to be a liability. I say reluctant because it is quite clear that a good segment of the gay community had to be co-opted by government to achieve their current but tenuous degree of acceptance and, now, the dubious privilege of attaching the word "marriage" to civil unions that would otherwise have had all the same privileges and responsibilities. Though marriage is not everybody's thing, one can understand the aspirations of those who long for social acceptance and for the open recognition of their love and choice of partners. Reluctant congratulations may be in order for the beneficiaries of New York State's gay marriage bill.